Welcome 2012 GOP Candidates!
Can Any Of You Beat This Man?

GQ’s Stephen Sherrill has written an orientation guide to the primary season for aimless Republican candidates. A sample below. Read the whole thing here.

Code of Conduct
While there are no official rules of behavior on the campaign trail, over the years some guidelines have been established, and each party has its own list of recommended conduct. Here are some for your side.
Do: Give a biblical justification for all policy positions.
Don’t: Talk about being Mormon. Or black.
Do: Talk about having a very distant great-aunt who is Hispanic and who taught you everything you know, but have since forgotten, about speaking Spanish.
Do: Disavow any positions you may have had in the past that were mainstream Republican policies as of ten years ago.
Do: Express your solidarity with the birthers.
Don’t: Express your solidarity with the birthers.
Do: Remind the American people that Democrats love the terrorists. Sure, Obama found Bin Laden and then calmly made the decision to have him killed—but he didn’t even torture him first!