The Selected Poetry Of Charlie Sheen, Vol. 2
(Yes, Actual Poetry He Actually Wrote.)
Earlier today, we shared the first installment of GQ correspondent Amy Wallace’s miraculous find: a self-published, rarely seen, impossible-to-find collection of poetry written by Sheen in the early ‘90s, titled A Peace of My Mind. And we promised to post more selections from the volume over the next day or two. Here’s the second installment. Once again: we swear to the Pope and all his assassins that every word of this is real. Keep coming back here for more.
By Charlie Sheen
“Excuse me, aren’t you…?”
“Hey, you look just like…”
“Oh my God, that’s…”
“Sorry to interrupt your dinner, but aren’t you…”
“Look, I never do this, but, my wife thinks you’re…”
“My friend is so convinced that you’re…”
“I’m so embarrassed, but, aren’t you…?”
“I know you must be tired of this, but…”
All eyes held in stare, all mouths locked open in shock, as he pulled the latex Charlie Sheen mask from his head, revealing the rotted skull of President Lincoln.